Have we confused professionalism with formality?

I came into the therapy industry after spending around ten years in hairdressing, and I think I brought a lot of what I’d learnt there with me.

I was brought up in quite a traditional salon environment. Being professional meant presenting yourself in a certain way, speaking in a certain way and keeping that clear professional boundary between you and the client.

So when I became a therapist, that was already quite rooted in me.

Then I trained, and if I’m being truthful, I felt a similar thing there too. This is how you massage. This is how you perform a facial. This is the routine. This is how a therapist should behave.

And for a long time, I thought being really good at what I did meant fitting into that.

But the more experience I’ve gained, the more I’ve started to question it.

Because I don’t actually think that’s what people resonate with.

Obviously professionalism is important. I’m not suggesting for a second that we should lose our standards or our boundaries. But I do think there’s a difference between being professional and having this wall of professionalism between you and your client.

And personally, I think that wall can feel quite outdated. A bit stuffy, even.

People want to connect with people.

They want to feel comfortable with you. They want to feel like they know you. They want warmth and personality. They want to feel that the person treating them is actually a person, rather than somebody playing the role of what they think a therapist should be.

You can be warm and still have boundaries.

You can be relatable and still be knowledgeable.

You can have a laugh with your client and still take what you do incredibly seriously.

Those things don’t cancel each other out.

I think our industry has come a long way, and the way clients choose who they spend their money with has changed too. We see the people behind businesses now, particularly through social media. We get a feel for someone before we ever step through their door.

And I actually think that’s a good thing.

Because when I think about what makes a brilliant treatment, so much of it comes back to connection.

It’s not only about whether you performed every step perfectly. It’s how that person felt around you. Whether they trusted you. Whether they could properly relax. Whether they felt looked after rather than simply treated.

And in my opinion, it’s difficult to create that kind of connection if you’re hiding behind a stuffy professional exterior.

I’m still professional. Probably more so now in many ways.

I just don’t feel like I have to perform professionalism anymore.

I can just be me.